Paper Fish for 2006 March

# Wed Mar 08 06:00:02
"Furry Lobsters" discovered

But how do they taste?

# Tue Mar 21 18:31:31
An Unlikely Post About Toothpaste
I used to work at Tom's of Maine. They make toothpaste (and other stuff, but they are mostly known for their toothpaste) with all-natural ingredients, no animal testing, etc. While I was there it was often stressed how different they were from companies such as, say, Colgate-Palmolive. Their innovative business practices would never work in such a corporation, it was claimed.

So I was greatly surprised to hear that Colgate is buying Tom's for 100 million. No doubt many of their customers who hate dealing with large corporations will be just as surprised. Of course everything will continue to be run the same way, and so on. For now.

I can't even imagine the force of spin in Kennebunk today. The press release has the language you'd expect:

"Just as importantly, we see Colgate as an excellent fit with our own cultural values. Colgate has a commitment to product excellence, to global efforts to promote oral health and has a 200-year history of caring for consumers and for giving back to the community. We are excited by Colgate's desire to continue Tom's of Maine leadership and heritage in natural care"

Of course they are so excited about this excellent fit that according to the Associated Press:

"Packaging of Tom's of Maine products will not identify the company as a Colgate subsidiary"

Tom Chappell once wrote:

"I wondered why all toothpastes were full of complex abrasives, dyes, artificial flavors, preservatives, binders, fluoride, and worst of all, saccharin, long suspected as a cause of cancer. Why were Americans consuming seven hundred million tubes of toothpaste every year and spending more than a billion dollars filling their mouths every day with chemicals?"

I guess he can ask them directly now.

# Wed Mar 22 12:16:53
Tom's of Maine Sell-off Reaction Roundup
Following up on my previous Tom's of Maine post, some reactions gathered via Technorati today:

• "Frankly a blow not only for family-owned companies, but for the quality of life for ToM workers as well. Colgate, if I recall correctly, was one of the companies whose cheating of the rank-and-file in order to pay executives crazy-ass-high wages was so egregious that it actually made the news a couple years ago"
• "Tom's of Maine just sold to Colgate-Palmolive. For One Hundred, Million Dollars (Dr. Evil laugh)."
• "Recently two of my fav favorite companies were bought out by mega-corporations I'd rather not support"
• "colgate just bought tom's of maine. this sucks. all the respectable companies are being bought out by these huge, animal-torturing mega-companies!"
• "Tom's of Maine and The Body Shop: Sell-outs?"
• "it sucks that companies like tom's of maine feel that they need to be bought by mega corps in order to stay afloat."
• "Colgate will buy Tom's of Maine Selling Out, or Infiltrating?"
• "I bought ToM because it was NOT Colgate. So much for voting with one's dollars. This news sucks, in other words."
• "Tom's of McWorld"
• "Tom's of Maine has been bought by Colgate. Crap!"
• "Another one falls to the man. Tom's of Maine to be bought by Colgate."
• "Tom's of Maine- sellout"
• "I buy a LOT of Tom's of Maine products. I'd better start shopping for other small, homemade brands, now"

# Thu Mar 30 11:48:07
Pets.com Cannot Be Put Down
I put some random Pets.com stickers I found up on eBay. Was surprised to find almost two dozen other Pets.com swag auctions. I think if they had more time to develop the sock puppet franchise, they could have kept the pet food component afloat.

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